It was a normal morning just like any other morning of an eight year old girl I guess. Woke up, ate breakfast, got dressed kissed my Mother goodbye and walked to the bus stop to hurry up and wait in the cold. I was happy because Christmas break was almost here. While patty caking "Miss suzy had a boy friend...." with my neighbor Christy the warm yellow bus finally pulled up. My friends and I climbed up to the middle left side like usual I saw Casey Hornsbee in the back with his legs hanging in the aisle describing something with his hands and kids gathered round that had been listening to him from the prior stops before. I'm not quite sure what drew me to get closer to him to hear what he had to say but what came out of his mouth changed my life forever. "There is no such thing as Santa" I remember hearing ringing in my ears and seeing Casey and the others almost pan out like I had been viewing him from farther way. It was like the bus got longer almost. The aisle went on and on. My heart raced! What was he saying? Is this right? I remember reflecting on all sorts of things like the time I thought I heard Santa's sleigh leaving our roof one Christmas morning but also seeing that my Dad had some bells in his hand behind his back. Or all those times I waited for him all night in my room with my brother going over what I thought I might see under the tree the next morning. I thought of the times I just wasn't lucky enough to hear Santa come down the chimney. It was all starting to make sense. Afterwards I of course then had even more epiphanies "if Santa isn't real then that must mean there isn't a tooth fairy either... Oh no what about the Easter Bunny?". The rest of the day I don't even really remember. This terrible, horrible, no good very bad news was shaping my whole life. Well at least my day anyway. I dreaded going home and seeing my mother. The afternoon was so hard. I didn't want to devastate her with the knowledge I now possess. As soon as I walked across the street I think my Mom knew something was wrong. She waited for me to come to her. I had to find out if this was true or not maybe just maybe Casey Hornsbee was wrong. Inside though I think I pretty much knew. So on the side of her bed while watching Phil Donahue I asked the dreaded number two question (the first being "Where do babies come from?' of course) "Is Santa real?" At first my mom felt me out.... she wanted to know where this question came from and what I had heard and from who. I caught her up to speed. Well she unfortunately confirmed the terrible horrible no good very bad news. I do remember her saying though "do you think you could play along for a little while though for your brother because he still believes" I nodded......
So why am I sharing this story with you all you may be asking? Because yesterday my little seven year old man didn't ask if Santa was real... no, instead he told us Santa wasn't real. Ugh, I really didn't think that was going to happen so soon but oh well. I found myself reacting the same exact way my mother had with "what makes you say that?" questions and also asking him to play along for his little sister. Can I just push these kids down literally and make them smaller? LOL sometimes I wish I could.......
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